AN ITALIAN WEDDING

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Back in August we spent a week in Italy. A bunch of us went to celebrate the nuptials of our dear friends, Anna & Joey.They recently moved from London to Malta, doing a road trip through Europe on their way. So cool! You can check out the travels here: The Rambling Flamingo

I have always been fascinated with Italy. Ok I'm fascinated with travelling. I want to go everywhere. But there was always something a little different about Italy. So to finally go on holiday to Italy, wow! I was excited! Andrew and I have always said we want to retire in Italy and after spending some time there, I don't think we should wait until we retire!

Although the trip had some glitches, it was still amazing. This was our first trip with a toddler. We had been to Cape Town with Lily when she was about 8 months old and that was a whole different experience. This time round Lily could walk, but mostly run! Packing for this trip seemed harder too. I'd never been to Italy before so I wasn't sure what was available on that side and I wanted to be prepared as much as possible. 

The build up to the trip was quite stressful, although still very exciting. Lily was teething, not 1 but 4 teeth were cutting through at the back. So I spent most of my nights/early morning's sleeping in a cot. Oh did I say sleeping? I meant curled up in a cot with a restless babe climbing on me and pressing her face against mine so hard it felt like she was trying to get inside my face. During the day, a teething Lily is clingy making it hard to get anything done such as pack for a trip, buy essentials that are needed for said trip and look up information one might need for this much anticipated trip. The day before I realised that I could not find Andrew's pair of smart black shoes he needed for the wedding. Where had they gone? We did a big charity drop off when we moved so perhaps they were in there..? So off I ran to the closest shop for shoes where the only decent pair I can find weren't the cheapest either. I get home to discover the shoes I ordered for Lily arrived while I was out, so a card was left for me to re-arrange delivery. Great. I call them back and the lovely lady is very helpful and arranges the delivery for the same day. What wonderful news! The shoes arrive that afternoon and are too big for Lily. Why did I take the risk and order them online? Luckily the bride to be is super chilled and happy for Lily to wear pink little sneakers with her flower girl dress. Phew! 

The day has arrived! We wake early and our taxi arrives and we're off to the airport. Note to self (there were many notes to myself), don't take two cabin bags and a large luggage bag with a pram on holiday! It's awkward to move this around once you've checked in and have to get around the airport and then the plane with an energetic toddler! I lost most of my ready formula's at security, I made the mistake of packing them in my cabin luggage. I know better than this so I'm not sure what I was thinking?! Once we were on the plane we were delayed for 50 minutes and had to sit strapped in while waiting. Then there was turbulence, so we had to stay strapped in for most of the flight. This was not easy with a toddler. No amount of distraction helped. Although the flight to Verona is not a very long one, when forcing an active toddler to stay strapped in, the flight feels never ending. I'm sure the passengers hated us but parent's deserve to travel too! And believe me, it might be annoying to your ears hearing an upset toddler on a plane but the parents are suffering more than you are - trust me. So by the time we reached the airport we were quite frazzled. We decided it was easier, quicker and most importantly, more toddler friendly to take a taxi to our hotel. The public transport would be much longer and wouldn't be direct. I hadn't had a chance to exchange any cash and needed taxi fare so the hunt through the messy handbag begins. Why is the handbag always organised when I leave the house but a shamble once I arrive at a destination? I couldn't find my purse, which had all our bank cards in it. I felt the air leave my lungs as I not only panicked, but literally collapsed. I threw everything out of my handbag, I could not find my purse! I couldn't believe that I had got my family stranded at an airport where we couldn't understand the language, had no cash and no way of reaching any of our contacts. I'm not shy to say it, I fell to my knees and cried. I can't remember the last time I felt so scared. Andrew spotted me and came running over. Usually he would have instantly stressed out but he stayed calm and thankfully he did as lo and behold, he found the purse sitting in my luggage trolley! I know, i know. It was careless of me to leave it there but I thank God that we found it!!

So after a stressful few days we eventually arrive at the hotel. We settle in and take a walk around. We have a lovely dinner and some wine made by the venue and at last feel like we are on holiday. On our second night all was well and Lily was fast asleep when I got into bed, and two minutes later I heard that gagging sound of someone about to vomit. I quickly lifted her up and turned her over and the poor thing got sick all over the travel cot, and then got sick some more. Every time we thought she was finished, she would get sick again. So there was no sleep that night, and all the bedding in the room was covered, including monkey. Andrew did his best to clean him as she really needed him that night. It was quite scary, watching her be so ill and go so limp, feeling helpless. Thankfully she woke up like her usual self. I felt terrible about all the bedding and left the cleaners an apology note, but they were more concerned about Lily and tole me not to worry. How lovely of them. Unfortunately the hotel weren't able to wash any of our items so we headed to town in search of a laundromat. We got out of the taxi and settled Lily in her pram only to realise the taxi had rode off and we left our nappy bag, purse and my phone in the car. Where were our minds?! We quickly called the driver and he returned within a few minutes. Another thankful moment! We weren't able to find a laundromat that was open and as it was a very hot day we headed back to the hotel with our bag of vomit clothing and bedding. We just washed it ourselves in our room. Besides, the pool was calling and our friends had arrived. Luckily my friend brought a bathing costume with for me (yes I didn't pack my own bathing costume).

A few days later we were heading back from the shops in our regular taxi and I suddenly wondered, where is our bank card? I asked Andrew and he checked his pocket, it wasn't there. Something green on the floor of the taxi caught our eye and there was our bank card! It had fallen out of Andrew's pocket when we were on our way to the shops. Thankfully we were in the same taxi on the way back. Had I not thought about it, we wouldn't have looked at the floor. I know, I know - us and this bank card!! So thinking that was the last of the mishaps, we were proved wrong. On the day of the wedding I opened up the suit bag to get Andrew's suit ready for day, and his pants weren't there. We had the blazer, shirt, tie, waistcoat but no pants. How could we forget the best man's trousers?! We shouldn't be allowed to pack for holidays, especially important ones that involve a wedding! 

The Beautiful Bride & Groom

So you see, we had quite a few glitches. That were mentioned....BUT it was still an amazing, memorable holiday that I'm so grateful to have enjoyed. It was awesome being with all of our friends in Italy. Hanging by the pool or the restaurants sipping on Spritz or Limoncello. Eating Pasta or Caprese Salad, exploring and just having nowhere else to go for a whole week. 

The wedding itself was beautiful. What wedding isn't?! The weather was perfect. The food delicious (I'm still dreaming about those rosemary potatoes), The view was rustic. I couldn't have asked for better company. Lily had a great time and slept through the reception, peacefully in her pram leaving us to enjoy ourselves. The Mojito's and Caffe' Corretto's flowed and flowed (I think the Grappa burned a hole in the tablecloth?). It was truly a wonderful wedding, and also a wonderful holiday. You can view the wedding photos here, taken by my pal: Natalie B Photography

It all went too quickly as all holidays do, but we shall return to Italy. Saying goodbye to Anna and Joey on their last night was surreal and I blubbered like I always do, but I know in my heart it's not good-bye but see you later. So thank you Italy!! You didn't let me down.

In the meantime I'll watch Under The Tuscan Sun on repeat and eat Caprese Salad each time I'm in an Italian mood.

S.

AN INTRODUCTION

I realised that I haven't properly introduced myself. So here goes :)

I am married and we have a 19 month old little girl named Lily. She is the love of our life, the best thing that has ever happened to us. We still look at her each day and thank God that she is ours. My maternity leave officially ended at the end of January. I have been at home with Lily ever since and I am currently looking forward to returning to work once I find a job. 

I was born in Cape Town, South Africa where I lived all my life until I moved to London with my then boyfriend, Andrew (we are now married). We moved to London in August 2008, always staying in the south. 

I love London. I grew up in awe of London, and England too. So once we moved here I couldn't believe how lucky I was to live in such an amazing city!! I still pinch myself today that I am fortunate enough to live in England. It was in London that we made some amazing friends and had some of the best times ever. We seriously had so much fun, perhaps too much fun ;) London is the kind of place that you can live in for years and you'll never be able to do it all or see it all. There's just too much and it changes all the time.

Not only do the places change in London, but your friends do too. Many of our friends moved on to other countries, either returning home or following their loved ones across the ocean. And all for the better. As wonderful as London is, it tends to suck you in and keep you stuck. Not everybody mind you, but certainly a lot of the people we knew. And it did for us. Everyone knows it's no secret that it's darn hard to get on the property ladder, but it's even harder in London! So if you're not living in a house share then you're lucky enough to live on your own. But at the expense of spending the majority of your salary on rent and bills. So it's hard to get ahead financially in London. It's fine while you're still in your partying days, sharing digs and thinking about the next party as opposed to planning a family and your future. For years Andrew and I dreamt of living in the country. We wanted to live where the pace is slower, the air is cleaner and the space more, well, spacious. We always said we didn't want to raise our children in London. As time went on we started feeling too cramped in London. This is probably also thanks to the tiny flat that we lived in. Once Lily arrived our flat got even smaller. And as Lily grew (alarmingly fast!) the even smaller flat started to swallow us. We knew that once we moved out of that flat there was no point in moving elsewhere in London. The next move would be out of London. So that's how we came to live here in Lewes. And we haven't looked back.

As happy as I was to leave that grotty, tiny flat we lived in, it was also hard to say goodbye to London. There were so many memories, so many conveniences, too much I still wanted to explore and experience. But I was ready for the countryside.

London will always have its pros and cons (sometimes these depend on a good or bad day). But it will always be there. And I can visit anytime. 

S.

VOLUNTEER TRAINING

Today I had my first session for the Volunteer Training Course. I am excited about going forward with this :)

Close to my home I have one of the best Children's Centre. I popped in one day to enquire about playgroups and nurseries for children and I was greeted with such friendly help. The ladies on duty let me know about a free Back To Work Course for mom's who have been on maternity leave. As I was (and still am) job searching this seemed like a no brainer!

The course was two, one day sessions and they offered free creche for the little ones. I felt at ease knowing that Lily was in the room right next door to mine and that I could look in on her at any time. This also gave her some wonderful time to enjoy being with other children and gave me a tester of what she would be like in nursery. So far so good! I could hear her enjoying herself, which means I could enjoy myself. It was lovely to sit in a room with other moms in similar situations. And I won't deny that it felt like a break, enjoying a few sneaky child free hours ;)The course was very insightful, giving us CV and interview tips. I thoroughly enjoyed it and have since put those tips to use.

The children's centre is always offering free learning courses for family. I also did an Introductory to Child Psychology course. Once again, this was so interesting and wonderful to be a part of it. I never knew there were these resources available to parents before. I certainly never came across such support when we lived in London! I was either oblivious to the help at hand or it was never pointed out to me or the children's centre's just don't offer the same kind of help. I am so happy to have this all available to me. The staff who work there are amazing and they go above and beyond what is needed of them. The organiser of the volunteer course has even arranged transport to and from the venue as it's in the next town (as the centre there is bigger).

So when I asked if I would like to join the volunteer course my original answer was no. But when speaking to the organiser the following week I realized that yes, it's something that I could actually enjoy. Firstly, while I am looking for a job I have free time so why not put it to good use? The pros of doing this course were too many to turn it down. I will be learning and some of the sections in the course is accredited. I will have something extra to put on my CV. It will look good to current employers. Lily is able to attend the free creche and as she loves being around children she will have so much fun. She will be stimulated and be in new surrounding's with so much learning and fun at her disposal. And selfishly, mommy gets a few hours break for the next couple of weeks and can enjoy some adult time too. I thought it's good for me to step out of my comfort zone, try new thing's and say yes to new experience's. Just listening to some of the stories today about previous volunteers was inspiring - I never know where this might lead me. And if it leads me nowhere, Lily and I have still only gained from this experience.

And then, I have always wanted to volunteer and to give something back but I just never knew if I had anything valuable to offer. Sounds silly I know but it's true. So now I have this amazing opportunity to learn volunteer training which I can put to use anywhere.

And I find it so exciting!

S.

VIVA THE LIBRARY!

“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.” - Dr Seuss

Today I signed up for a library membership for myself and Lily. This would be Lily's first ever library membership. I got all excited holding her first library card!

I love reading. I always have. I always will. I spent most of my childhood and teenage youth with my nose stuck in books. I would spend hours at the library. My safe haven. I love the calmness you find there. The quiet corner where you can sit and read and browse and page. Time standing still, only to suddenly speed up when you leave the library. Even the smell of books is a sensory enjoyment. I often just flick all the pages past my nose just to get a whiff!

Reading is the best escape (as well as music, writing and drawing). I miss all these things. It's all I ever did when I was young. Like most typical teenagers I lived in my bedroom, only leaving when I needed to. I would be so engaged in a good thriller that I never realised the sun going down and the evening becoming dark. When i got older and started clubbing I would even come home and pick up that thriller again because I had to know what happened next. I was a complete night owl back then, now I can't seem to stay awake (i blame that on age and motherhood). Yes, I have fond, fond memories of reading when I was young. I guess it's also because I was shy and a little introverted so books became my friends. I didn't notice time when reading, or worry about boredom or the outside world. When i was a kid we lived in a block of flats in Muizenberg and because of the position of the mountain the sun always seemed to set early leaving the flat feeling dark and nippy. I would come home from school and have the place all to myself (which was nice as come evening time our home was always full of people). So I would tidy up the flat and then make myself some toast and tea and sit right outside our front door where the last bit of sun would be shining (I call this sun seeking) and I'd get lost in my books. It would be just me and my book. Bliss.

I couldn't tell you the name of any authors and I don't have a favourite genre either. I pick book's that appeal to me. It can be a suspense, a biography or a love story. I miss reading. Since Lily's arrival I have far less time to myself, I thought I would be able to catch up with all my books while on maternity leave - how naive I was! But now that Lily is 17 months old thing's are more structured and I hope to pick up my books again and get really stuck in. Right after I sort the house out and unpack the last of the boxes and do all the 100 items on my to do list! Ha! 

I hope Lily will love to read as much as I do. I want to see her spend her free time reading for the love of it. She already has a love of books, we shower her with books and she loves playing with them, paging through them, carrying them around and even eating them! We're hoping she'll get bored of the taste of books but continue to enjoy them. And she's one smart cookie too! We will ask her to fetch a certain book, be it Postman Pat or The Crunching Caterpillars and she will bring us the exact one we have asked for.

So I am very much looking forward to spending many hours with Lily at the Library (once she understands that books are not a food group) and I hope she will appreciate the wonderful gift and privilege that a library is.

S.

COMPARISONS

Every mother has at some point, compared herself to other mothers. It's hard not to with the media constantly shoved in our faces. We'll compare ourselves to the mothers we follow on the Instagram, the mothers we pass on the street, to the mothers we know personally. Most of these comparisons will usually happen on a bad day. The kind of day where everything goes wrong or you just feel like you can't hold it together. But these days are the ones you should be extra kind to yourself. Every mother has felt the way you do right now.

That mother you're comparing yourself to might look happy and bubbly today, with freshly washed hair. Her little toddler is wearing matching clothes. Her toddler is sitting peacefully in the pram while you wait in the queue at the post office (unlike your little one who is wailing to get out of the pram). You might even see a mother jogging with her little one in her jogger pram, making you feel unfit and lazy. The point is, on the days you feel low you will see many mothers that look like they have it together, their toddlers are being little angels and you can't help but compare yourself - feeling inadequate or like a failure. But remember that you didn't see that mother on her bad day. When she was also wearing clothes with food and formula on it that she failed to notice, when her hair still hadn't seen shampoo for the 4th day , when her baby was having a cranky day, basically when she too, was having a terrible day. What you don't realise is that she was probably comparing herself to you. Because we all do it. We all have those days. All mothers are human.

So remember - be kind to yourself. 

S.

WELL HELLO THERE!

This would be my first official post, so please be kind!

I've been wanting to get a blog up and running for years, but even more so now that I'm a mother. So here it is - my humble blog. As I'm new to this and have a lot to learn - I am sure many thing's about this blog will change along the way but that's what will make this fun! I do hope you enjoy my journey - and I'd love to hear yours :)

S.